Hey guys, I think mother might be trying to kill me. It’s not just that she walked into a wall last night while holding me–geesh, watch where you’re going, mom!–but now she won’t feed me although I’m asking for food at the top of my lungs! She told me I didn’t want more. That if she did give me more it would hurt.
Umm, I do indeed want more. You hear me asking at the top of my lungs. I’m am right next to the foods and I want to sleep, so give me the foods and I will sleep! By the way, on a completely unrelated note, my tummy is full of gurgles and is squishing me. That makes me want to cry too. If she were a good mommy, she’d solve that too. Either way, I don’t like this world and want to sleep, so give me the foods. Now!
Though, maybe mommy’s not okay. Because on two of the last three nights, in the night when I woke up and wanted to eat to sleep, mommy said I was full (Maybe YOU are full, don’t speak for me!) and gave me to Daddy. Umm, Mommy, Daddy doesn’t even have the foods. He’s not an appropriate caretaker for a little guy in need of some sleep. Then just to make it worse, when I’m having a real yell about all that, mommy puts some music on. Now how on earth am I supposed to sleep where there is pretty music going on?